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WHAT YOU SHOULD DO:

  • Listen to both sides.
  • Ask what is going on in a polite and calm manner.
  • Be relaxed when confronting the side that has had a bad experience with the side you support.
  • Make sure, in the future, you do not bring either side into one room/area. That way old wounds won’t open too soon.
  • Find a solution.

WHAT YOU SHOULD NOT DO:

  • Do not instigate the side you do not support.
  • Do not make excuses for any side.
  • Do not construe or delude the truth to make one side look better or worse.
  • Do not humiliate or shame either side.
  • Do not shame the other side.
  • Do not victim blame because you feel they are lying. You may have known someone for such and such years and yet not truly know them. It is not entirely impossible, especially over the internet where the truth can easily be hidden.
  • Do not attack the other side for any reason.

All in all, do not be a rude individual to another individual all because you heard only one side. Get both sides and do not rely on your side’s pity plea or radical action (someone who feels attacked for something they claim they did not do often tend to do or say something radical to misdirect the attention somewhere else; preferably in their direction so they look good, and the victim looks bad).

Do not let it get to this point.

There are, however, situations where there is a huge misunderstanding between the two parties. What each person or party that has an altercation or distaste should do, is sit down and explain their feelings in a calm manner (oftentimes, the ones who feel are being attacked and are very upset and less offended do not deny the claims as they try and garner support for their hurt feelings, rather than keep to the subject at hand- keep an eye out for that).

If someone is venting, let them vent. That is how they feel, and often times not what actually happened. What someone perceives is their own memory, and not what may have happened.

To prevent this, always, always, always keep chat logs, chat recordings, and photos to help keep what was actually said and done to be as truthful as possible.

And if someone was offended or hurt by something you said intentionally, without the intention of hurting them? Apologize anyway. It can be something like this, “I am sorry you feel that way,” to “I am sorry you feel that way, but I do not take back what I said because there is a reason to it.”

It can make all the difference in the world once you accept that what you said or did was not okay to that specific individual, and could help you in your next verbal adventure.

When it comes to physical encounters, it is best to keep pictures of fresh evidence if there are any physical ailments caused by such and such encounter with any individual or party.

(source - dylibird)

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